kongyee.blogspot.com | the wheels on the bus go round and round

Sunday, July 31

+somebody shoot me+

playing: groove armada - hands of time

the week has been more or less routinal.

work has been boring. i got so many rejects i simply couldnt be bothered anymore. the thought of selling has long been gone, and the thought of quitting has always been hitting on me for days. my good buddy, alex quit today. now the group is only left with two and we will be joining the main group. competition would be stiff, but i really dont care anymore. someone find me a job for one month and i can kiss the boss goodbye for good.

my grandma has been bedridden for a week. ever since she fell for a second time since some 3-5 years ago. now my mom has to walk her to the toilet, clear her bowels and bath for her. poor granny. aunt's been to my house from her place from jurong west for more that three times this week already. i wonder when this is going to take. my dad's taking things slowly thou, and i know he's preparing for the worst.

my temper has gone bad all of a sudden. from the stress of work, home and my own expectations of myself, i seriously wonder what is left for me. i feel useless and wasted. i get pissed off easily and hardly smile nowadays. the majority of the populace in the company are faggots and i seriously wonder when i will resort to my first stick. no, no, no. thats gonna give me black lungs and those disgusting pictures i see on the cigarette boxes. lets drown the sorrows in booze. we'll destroy one liver and leave the other one to cleanse the rest of the body. we'll spend the rest of our lives thinking what else we can do to make merry and not bother about any other things. lets just shoot each other and perish in this sea of wretched souls like me...

[[ Fallen Saint ]]*|23:40:00|
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+we dont always get what we want+

playing: anna nalick - breathe(2am)

i aspire to be successful when i grow up. i fancy her as my girlfriend.

i want this. i want that. we always hope for too many things in life which we cant reach even if we haf 1000 years. get a life people. do what you can. leave the rest for things to drop from the sky. no i dont mean dun hope and wish for miracles to happen. you still can haf inspirations and hunger. just be realistic.

often what we get in the end isnt what we yearn. "i want to get 90 marks but i only got 85." "i want to go to paris but i only got to hawaii on my honeymoon." this is seen everywhere. i think we humans just never gets satisfied. that makes us humans after all. the hunger for success, the thirst for enemy's blood. that freaks me out seriously.

how many of us actually got to where you initially planned to go? less than half of you reading this i guess. unless you haf resolute will-power to go all the way. we always land up somewhere else; some of us falter on the midst of accomplishing the goal, some of us give up before even embarking on the mission.

not all of us haf a stroke of luck being bill gates or sim wong hu who are successful and powerful. some of you aspire to be them in 10 years, maybe 15. i dont. i dont haf that hunger for that kind of extravagant life, i dont really ask for an opulent and comfortable future, with 3 maids waiting on my family. that is a dream for everyone, of course. i dont mean you people cant haf dreams. dreams are only dreams unless you make them happen. its an arduous task for me to do. im not pessimistic; im just realistic (bro taught me that =])

what is gotta say in the end would be to continue dreaming if you belief in those fairytales. i dont mean it wont happen, i just need to see things materialising before i start to make believe. skeptical me.

[[ Fallen Saint ]]*|22:56:00|
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Saturday, July 30

+things dont usually go as planned+

spinning: james blunt - you're beautiful

i used to think everything would go my way. the things people would say to me, the way i would react to it, the life that has been planned for me had always been what i had imagined it to be. but that is not always so true nowadays.

am i too confident in the way i deal with the things which come my way? being too sure of yourself sometimes aint good. i know that. but does self-confidence breeds failure? i do not know. i feel so lost now. somebody please enlighten me with your superior proficiency.

tbc..

[[ Fallen Saint ]]*|18:58:00|
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Thursday, July 28

+a letter to the boss+

the voice inside my head is screaming ever louder every single day. with the hours clocking escalating while the sales remain rock bottom, the pressure on me is intensifying tremendously. adding more fuel to the dire situation, our supervisor actually called upon the student group today. dropping hints here and there trying to get us off the company. and again, at the end of our shift, deliberately asking why we were still giving blank sheets.

we need the cash boss. so we wont ever have to see your stiff face every single day, patrolling every 15 mins to see a blank sheet of order form and giving us more stress as a result. give us the cash, and we will walk out of that pathetic little freak place forever. find me the place which remunerates as attractively every single month for my indulgences, and we can crawl out your underachieving association.

maybe we should just give up the fight. the fight which will go on for as long as we stay. the struggle would only leave me bruised and sad. to you the manager, you can never understand what we are going through. sitting high up and watching us like little puppies, making us work like slaves at your command. yeah we all hate you. the bossy side of you. the flirty side of you. the oratory side of you.

[[ Fallen Saint ]]*|23:57:00|
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Wednesday, July 27

+graduation ceremony post mortem+

the 45th annual graduation ceremony ends today with more than 700 students from the school of chemical and life sciences from singapore polytechnic walking out of the convention centre with their smart formal wear, clenching their scrolls in one hand, and full of hopes in the other.

i am proud to be one of them. (who wouldnt be proud of themselves after surviving three long painful years of studying) the diploma im holding means i got more options now. a higher pay shld i be able to secure a job somewhere in the industry after my national service, taking a big step towards manhood.

watching the crowds of excited graduates and their parents together, i thought i never lived to see the sight of this in my life. the kind of graduation you will normally observe in any tertiary schools, minus the attire you normally find in universities and the throwing of hats into the sky. the mandatory action of receiving your scrolls from the guest of honour, taking photos from all sorts of cameras till patches of black and white starts flashing in your eyes. some final catching up with the ones you haven seen since i left the school gates straight after exams ended, a little more chit-chatting with the lecturers whom we had so much fun with for one final time, while enjoying the sumptuous spread of tea reception in the sweltering heat. the day became more meaningful when i met my japanese sensei, she was so happy for most of us who have graduated. i could still vividly remember when we actually prepared a cake and she cried for us.

looking at some of these things brings back so much memories. the old buildings. the new ones which stood beside them which never appeared during the course of my studies there. each block reminds me or someone or something special which happened there. i haven got a chance to go by our blocks, the library, the foodcourts, the hawkers whom we patronise and give us special discounts on certain occasions. the foodcourt table which one particular girl always sat, one stall we spent hours queueing up just for the savoury dishes served, the long walks to certain blocks where we can catch girls of different schools gathering. these places can only be relieved when we go back to the same old places once again, but i guess time does not allow that anymore. we are all going to lead different paths in life. maybe ten years down the road, when we all start our own families, we will gather once again, and relieve the old jokes we used to have, the memories will then be refreshed in our minds.

this chapter of my life is going to be the brightest i am going to live. the ones i grow old smiling, never regreting every single action i made to enter my polytechnic days. the time i grow from boy to man. the ones who came into my life and made an impact. the people who laughed and cried with me have already engraved their names in my heart. as i try to end this chapter of my teenage with a bang, only the memories and photographs will live me through when i look back on this very moment.

[[ Fallen Saint ]]*|23:27:00|
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Tuesday, July 26

+customer satisfaction/blogging+

music playing: lenny kravitz - where are we running

"customers are always right.." yah, thats true if you're providing a service, selling something, opening a shop catering to people. being able to cater to their needs like they should in an appropiate and cheerful manner is something customers look out when they patronise your store.

customer satisfaction simply put means satisfying every customer's need and not getting a complaint as a result. does it also mean that you can deceive your customers to a certain extent while satisfying their every need? being in the business for barely three months, i do not really understand.

i tried my very best to sell, staying within the customer satisfaction boundaries, and of course being frank with my people all these while. this cost me my sales. no cash. no incentives. on the other hand, some of the colleagues used the partially deceiving mentality as their primary objective while making customers appeased with what they get in the end. does that truly live up to the meaning customer satisfaction? i question myself with that every day. till that day when i find that out, i would have been shown the boot out of the little pathetic place.

reading today's papers, i stumbled upon something i find so interesting. the current hot topic on blogging. the author, tan, said something i totally acknowledge. she puts bloggers on this "self-aggrandising egotists" mindset, dedicated to me, me and me. i realised after reading so many different blogs, bloggers tend to have the mentality that the whole world wants to read his blog (yours truly included). why are we still eagerly blogging every single day without fail, for no money nor fame. probably for recognition. for all the attention you get when people read about you.

so what makes a blog? an online diary where you can pour out to your inner souls, or an avenue to start your little cult by getting everyone to join you in your petition to more freedom you longed wished for? i believe its a mix of both. as long as you enjoy what you get from blogging, be it for attention, for a certain belief that someone on the other side of the world gets to hear your sad stories, or just purely a personal intimate space, i guess its still quite okay. just like tan has mentioned, thats what makes blogs so attractive and addictive in the end. keep blogging people. for the best of yourself, or the ones who avidly visits.

[[ Fallen Saint ]]*|23:42:00|
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Monday, July 25

+clocks are ticking+

music: coldplay - clocks

the clock is ticking, the bells will soon ring, and my time shall end by then.
that is why i made a pact with myself.
before this chapter of my life ends, im gonna meet all my folks one last time
to catch up, take a photo or two.

we are left with so little time in the best years of our lives that we gotta keep every second of it worthwhile
eating ard all corners of the island, dancing in all the clubs, drinking all the different kinds of coffee in town and tasting every single liquor that is selling out there
who wants to join me?
live this chapter of my life before i can embark on my new lease of life in 6 weeks' time
den im able to look back and smile at this happy 20 yr old
who doesnt give a hoot about people's comments,
come up with a different hairstyle everyday
go to places he wants and not bother what plans he has today
but jus going out and making the most out of his life

by the way, im so gonna get sacked after clocking an amazing 30 hours without a single sale
anyway, time's too short for me to work in that shitty place
im would be grateful if they just do me just this favour

[[ Fallen Saint ]]*|23:35:00|
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+life is nostalgic+

playing: story of the year - sidewalks

this entry supposed to be sunday's.
theoretically it is sad and carries bits of nostalgic-ness that has been with me for the past week
due to the various reasons and excuses i always give myself like the mouse and computer bugs hindering me from this space
i shall make this one a really short and brief one

firstly, what makes this entry worthy of the title "nostalgic"?
i guess what triggered me was the departure of three or four people whom i worked with
the people whom i had so much fun and just got to know
only to realise their school starts offically today
why is god so unfair to people sometimes huh.
when life is short and so much to offer
why do we haf to part only to have made new friends within a short space of 2 months

does friends only mean saying hi when we see each other on the streets, if fate grants us this special wish?
or does it mean able to laugh and talk about tons and tons of crap bud only for a short stint.
i do not know. i realise i haven been much thru life to be able to comment.

on the other brighter side of life
there are many other things to keep us smiling always
the success in careers, the love of our families, and other little perks in life like the addition of a new pet, a little compliment someone insignificant said but meant hell-of-alot to u
a new hair-cut, a new set of clothes, a new bag, a new pair of sneakers, a new set of hi-fi system, a new lap-top with the latest programmes to go with it, a new girlfriend, a new lease of life
those are some smaller stuffs which might make me happy.
how about u?
throw away the nostalgic bits which cling onto u like little bugs
because in the end you realise what you get when you can be so much lighter
and more satisfied with youself smiling rather than frowning
but of cuz that means you haf to let go of the happy yet gone yesterdays
and be prepared to receive the unforeseeable tomorrows which will hit us very very soon

[[ Fallen Saint ]]*|14:40:00|
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Saturday, July 23

+6 weeks+

music spinning: oasis - love like a bomb

its been awhile..
but anyhows, today was worth blogging.
so there.

went to this image talk organised by forever living
got invited by melvin, my cjc buddy
thanks mel.
he got into the company as a distributor and blah blah
tried to psycho me into being one of the members.
sorry bro. not very interested.

the talk however was interesting
mostly on women's beauty, make-up and fashion stuffs
bud speaker ida ong touched some parts on men's fashion
and some men's beauty tips
at least making the men somewhat keeping their interest
and the trip worth every mile they travelled there
either with their friends, or with their wives

80% of the crowd were females
thats basically sums up why this talk was initially for
and that also explains why ida chong touched so much on the feminine side
and barely anything on the male portion
im surprised to see nepalese people there
it really shows how well received the speaker is huh.

left the scene at about 6.
headed to boat quay area to meet up with the new recruits
ndp rehearsal blocked off the whole bridge and we became stranded
not being able to get to the other end where esplanade and marina square stood
roamed about fullerton hotel and the merlion area before moving on to plaza sing

ichiban sushi was crowded.
swensen's packed. and the queue outside jus killed any apetite
cafe cartel. needless to say. the queue along turns off everyone
the fast food restaurants were full too. with throngs of people waiting for seats
the only place we went to which was stil avaliable was yoshinoya
at least there's somewhere we could fill our tummies, sit down and chat for a long long time

i love yoshi. an alternative to mos burg for jap food
and dun u find the place there so home-like
with the rice, vege and a choice of beef, chicken or salmon
traditional miso soup and free flow of fresh red ginger to go with it
yummy.

so the chit chatting began.
the army life. the shitty army life
its gonna be hard, boring, crappy
no vaginas for 2 long years
im glad they are taking their army lives in a positive manner
wonder whether life goes on well for me likewise.
i dun know.
seriously im not mentally prepared.
nor am i mentally strong enuff like the rest
will i break down not being able to stand tall among the rest
just 6 weeks separate me from the long awaited national service
its looks far. but its just there.
waving to me. sucking me in deeper every single day
lets jus enjoy the few weeks left with vigor.

[[ Fallen Saint ]]*|23:18:00|
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Wednesday, July 20

+everybody's mad+

matchbox twenty - mad season

i realised many things changed since i got this major fever outbreak. besides the capricious cloud shapes in the sky and whimsical weather on both extremes, the house is going thru major shifts.
my grandma's condition deteriorated after she fell a second time after so many years. she's become more feeble and weak ever since. she needs aid even to the toilet. ouch. it hurts to see her in pain.

my dad fell sick straight after i recovered. no, he did not get infected because of me. because i did not even see him since i fell sick (i was always under my thick blankets shivering for the past few days.) my brother got himself the new harry potter book. i tink these harry potter books are the perfect analogy of building castles in the sky. j.k. rowling must be happily laughing her ass off after starting to pen down fantasies for these young children. she was so broke before she started writing. now she's earning big bucks. what a way to change your life.

as for me, i've become more spastic (as rach would normally say) since my fever saga. i seriously tink the heat has burnt most of my smart brain cells. i haf problems even recalling the name of my colleague at one instance. because im more "stupid", it makes me feel less pressured trying to get things off my chest sometimes.

today's work was more or less like a chit-chatting session. it is always starting with the conventional selling, den more psycho-ing, finally ending off by making sure customers get rubbed off with some of my crazy happy moods. the usual talk-cock session when it was our self-declared break times, all part of the time-wasting ploy.

wednesday tonight means md sultan must be full of chicks and hunks again. i miss drinking and my old folks. those people are in camp right now. anyway just recovered so i shant be thinking about clubs right now. hope to see the dudes when they book out this weekend.

[[ Fallen Saint ]]*|23:59:00|
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Monday, July 18

+fever outbreak+

the past two days has been crap
flu, fever, sore throat and a whole lot of bugs attacking me all at once
my head has been spinning and burning so much i lost track of time
my body temperature peaked at 38.7 degrees
i fainted while walking to the bathroom
slpt in there for 5 mins realising it wasnt right
the only thing i rmb is popping in panadols and munching on strepsils
after looking at the panadol box in the morning
haf i realised how much i haf consumed

oh wadeva.
i love the sweat outbreaks after panadol intake
gives u the "body-is-purging" feeling
and the wierd thing about fever
is when u sweat, you shiver at the same time
its been years since one of these fever hit me so badly
so im kinda new to this feeling
oh the last major fever outbreak,
was during my primary 3 days
chicken pox + fever
i had to be admitted to the hospital
cuz it peaked to 42 deg
can u belief it?
the doctors tot i was dying
lol. fortunately i got a second chance to live

finally now i got the chance to say..
stay healthy people
you never know what being healthy means

[[ Fallen Saint ]]*|22:01:00|
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Saturday, July 16

+the urge to splurge+

the final two weeks of gss
ever since it started in end may
saw the mags, the papers everywhere advertising
the scenes of clothes snatching, price slashing everywhere

expect more of those in the next two weeks
more slashing to be done
thats gonna tingle the hearts of people like us
eyeing for that piece on the display for the last 1 month

pay check jus got in.
after loads of bills and debts to clear,
im left with nothing
lol. but still, my wishlist goes on and on forever
it has been building ever since december last year
plus work building up,
its only fair we reward ourselves with some proper retail therapy

let jus hope those im eyeing on gets more slashing =]

[[ Fallen Saint ]]*|22:47:00|
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+capricious, unpredictable weather+

the rain pours,
the wind blows
people shut their windows everywhere
umbrellas like mushrooms sprouting
people dont talk much anymore trying to keep themselves dry and warm
like an imaginary barrier,
the rain shafts people away

people tend to fall sick in these uncertain conditions
one person sneezes
the next one starts to do the same
soon the whole place adopts the same habit
the rain makes me sick

im drowning in honey with lime, plain water and green tea =[

[[ Fallen Saint ]]*|22:36:00|
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+family bonds+

spinning: geri halliwell - love never loved me

is it the monsoon season?
the weather has been wet
the bus is always cold
the office window panes are always frosty
anyhows, in the cold office,
some stuffs stil warm my heart
the family bonds..
here are two customers i heard over the week

first customer:
this malay girl was so sweet she actually subscribed without haste
hearing his grandparents loved sports
eventually she got herself the movie channels
had fun talking to her while introducing to her the different packages
she said her parents cant afford
so she's working part time so she can subscribe for them..
(my heart is melting)
i just gave her wad she wanted and not push too much for commision

second customer:
not actually a customer la
bud wad he said provides enough fatherly love to the children
he gave up his passion for watching tv for his kids
because his offsprings were glued to the tv set
watching cartoon and mtv
he terminated the box and sent it back that very moment
he said it with so much gust
lol. very touched sia.
oh later on, he told me about his life
very long story. but very touching in the end

sometimes talking to other people, you understand their problems and what they are facing
you can apply to your own. and avoid a mishap. maybe not mishap, prevent something drastic from happening
talking to other pple's parents seemed like talking to an old friend
they pour out their kids problems to u
i duno why they did that. but i somehow find it very appealing to hear
they start telling me the troubles being a parent
thinking for their kids.
life sucks huh. its stil better being the child
the one being loved, the one at the receiving end
treasure the family love you have
cuz they are the ones who are gonna see u thru your whole life

[[ Fallen Saint ]]*|00:34:00|
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Friday, July 15

+mood like the rainy day+

it rained today. again.
i remembered the last time it rained was on sunday
the office was cold today
very very cold.
they switched on the fans even thou everyone was complaining

btw this stupid female supervisor cracked a super low IQ joke on me
fuck u auntie.
its not funny at all.
the girl sitting beside me is not hitting on me.
she was asking me some questions and its work-related okie?
i tink sales too bad today u gotta walk around more often
pressing for sales sia..
that you got nothing much to do den crack stupid jokes
u tink thats very motivating for us issit?

anyway due to the sharp increase in the number of smokers in the company
the security guards imposed a $250 fine on anyone caught lighting a stick within the premises
how crap is that. they are giving smokers more chance to slack
by asking them to smoke outside
rules rules rules

ever since they brought the student group into the main office
i have been mingling with the old and experts
old = no motivation
expert = pressure
basically working there sucks more den ever
got rules to follow, got so many more people around me submitting in forms
i need another job quick and fast, pronto
no waiters or sales jobs this time please

going home sucks too
because the bus driver was driving a race course
braking and accelerating like nobody's fucking business
reckless driving kills
how the heck did he get his license..
i guess when he got it, sbs transit were desperate looking for pple
its time to sack him sbs transit!
forgot to take down his bus plate number
cuz i was too sick and puky when i got off

btw, bastille day on july 14
france must be celebrating it grandly.
eiffel tower must be damn fucking glamorous now
sigh =[

[[ Fallen Saint ]]*|00:19:00|
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Thursday, July 14

+nkf scandal+

its early thurs morning
theoretically, this is the time where dancing and partying is most rampant
while sadly, we're still sitting here blogging our pathetic lives away

if you have been reading the papers today
the spat on nkf ceo withdrawing his defamation claims to straits times senior writer ms susan long
heard about his odious offence since my sec school days
finally this immoral inside man has got his infringement exposed
lets hear what the public has to say about his violation of board rules

btw, happy birthday wenyun - 13 july
happy birthday tan bin - 14 july
society has got us all working and busy
so i guess this year there's no celebration or presents?
anyhows, enjoy your day with that special someone

[[ Fallen Saint ]]*|00:13:00|
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Tuesday, July 12

+parting is a part of life+

12 july marks the day two of my good friends parting me.
firstly, bro fadzli left for the police academy to start his career early this morning
tink he should be happily in bed
all clean and shaved =]

later today, clara flew off to australia for further studies
i realised we haf all grown up and life has definitely changed so much for us
no more playing around, no more toying with little foolish acts we used to haf
met up with some of the year one pals and some of their classmates
all of us were there to send clara off
the airport was again packed with anxious parents, friends, relatives clogging the departure gates
the mandatory routine of flash lights, exchanging a few last words, hugs, and finally the crying bit. tissue were drawn out of bags and more crying proceeded.

the usual sight today meant so much more for me.
cuz im actually watching my friends weeping
maybe haven seen this bunch cry
mix feelings clouded my brains
wanted to part and stand back for a moment or two for my little own tearbreak
LOL. men do cry sometimes.
changi airport is a place which makes me cry most

had some chit-chatting session at burger king
didnt really haf this sort of "outing" with the food gang
so i guess its pretty fresh
thou i know most of the people there
maybe we werent into the talking-kind of friends
bud it was definitely fun. =]
i enjoyed it thoroughly

my dad left for genting this morning
i didnt know till he told me to look after his car ytd
that guy. nv jio me go, knowing i got tons of time to burn
he's probably on his way to big cash and enjoying lots of cheap food
enjoy urself man dad.
come back safe and sound!

[[ Fallen Saint ]]*|23:03:00|
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Monday, July 11

+sin city+

violence. sexual. action.
all the aspects you see in a r21 movie
this show has all of it
All based on the brilliant graphic novels
"Sin City", "The Big Fat Kill" and "That Yellow Bastard",
written and illustrated by Frank Miller

in basin city,
where corruption is rampant, crime rates soaring high
you see blood everywhere
people shot and waking up the next moment
they are not dead until you chop them up into pieces
check out the simple yet deadly weapons they use in the movie
special director Quentin Tarantino from kill bill vol 1 & 2
plus a huge cast for the movie
(because there are actually three stories going on in it)
you can be sure your money is worth every cent

jessica alba, bruce willis, josh hartnett, jamie king, clive owen,
brittany murphy, elijah wood, devon aoki, mickey rourke
are some faces u will find familiar
unless you are someone who loves violence,
topless or somehow scantily clad women
you will find this show gory.
if you are 21. go catch it.
if you are not, ask me how to get it.
enjoy the show.
rating: 4.5/5

[[ Fallen Saint ]]*|23:33:00|
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Sunday, July 10

+things happen for a reason+

spinning: corrinne may - everything in its time

they say things happen for a reason
i say the reasons make things happen
all things around us happen because of a reason
they dont jus, exist. someone made them.
just like someone made us
someone made this place for us to stay
add in all the things like trees, birds, river to spice things up
the place seems pleasant and beautiful
but there's stil darkness present here
life is still pretty much full of deceptions and lies

routinal sunday like the rest of the weeks
minus the feeling of knowing friends will be there for u
fadz say my core group of friends are gone.
i realised that was true.
i feel lost without them.
on tues, fadz will be heading for the police academy
that leaves me with not much people left
the chirping of birds early in the morning outside my window
(literally, cuz my room is on the third floor)
the sound of motors in cars driving past on a lazy sunday morning
families painted the coffeeshop with colours, spending their morning together
trying to spend quality time together
the bus on sundays was always packed with people attending their morning service
and im always late for work
i really hate that you know.
i dont want to be late.
these people caused it. the traffic on sundays is treacherous
jay-walkers like me freak out watching the cars whiz by

office was quiet. as in not many people came
it is actually very noisy.
people talking on my left, my right, in front, and behind
not like a fish market fortunately
i feel crappy with the old colleagues in the main office
cause they are so lame given their age.
they still very much, like to flirt and make merry
they make me laugh for awhile. and then work resumed
and then more jokes. finally the day just ended like that.
i love talking to them.
maybe they are funny. maybe its just that there's no one else

god weeped a whole lot today.
i wonder why.
because its sunday? maybe london won the olympics?
or because of the bombings?
scientifically, they say its just the water cycle.
the natural phenomenon when there's no rain for days
it made the office cold. it made people talk more
cause breath produces more heat, which in turns warm themselves up
when people talk, they bond more.
therefore, raining is fun!
LOL.

btw, i saw this book at home borrowed from the library
totally caught my attention
the book all about FRANCE!
i haven finished it. but the author so got my attention already.
one of my shortlists for my honeymoon!

i love blogging on sundays.
as a matter of fact, i love blogging.
it makes me pour out.
it makes me speak what my heart wants to say
it makes me a happier person..

[[ Fallen Saint ]]*|22:52:00|
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Saturday, July 9

+apologies. boredom. lovey+

spinning: depeche mode - strange love

i apologise. if i had caused any stirs last nite
good everything is cleared up now
sorry bro. u know i never meant it.
reading in between the lines sometimes cause problems
ya know wad i mean.. =]

i hate saturdays
the past two weeks has been bad
going back to the secondary school days
where i have to stay "grounded" at home
taking care of my granny..
its quite okie having the new com all to myself
but its like im so sick of internet all of a sudden
i feel like hitting the streets
but as u guys know..
there's no one left for me to talk to
i hardly find 10 pple online on weekends nowadays
okie if u pple ever need pple to catch a movie,
go town buy that cheap tee shirt going on sale
or just needing someone to talk to
jus call me!
im seriously bored and desperate for pals =]

watched the wedding singer jus now via channel 5
who says free-to-air channels suck?
this show goes into the little booklet where all the golden love movies are
the one u can watch over and over again and never get tired of
i'll grow old with you, as what (robbie) adam sandler sang to drew barrymore (julia)
how very sweet. watching this show without someone in mind doesnt really mean anything at all

[[ Fallen Saint ]]*|22:35:00|
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Friday, July 8

+racist rant part 2+

spinning: eagle eyed cherry - save tonight

i had a wild dream last nite
this girl, apparently i know her, but never talk since ages
came into my dream
i wonder why. i was talking with her in my dreams!
thats probably the worst dream i've ever had
how come girls i like never pop into my dreams like she did?
is this heaven in the making? or jus coincidence?
let time reveal all the unknown secrets...

most of everyone's blog must be talking about london now..
first it was their success bid in 2012's olympics
less than 24 hours its the terrorist attacks in certain areas in london
havent got into the situation until i saw the papers..
from "cheers london" in thurs papers
to "terror bombs rock london" today
the terrorist knew london was going to win?
or rather they know london is vulnerable
cuz the other time some reporter walked into 10 downing st with a fake bomb
and never got caught?

back to the topic, racist rants.
i wonder why the terrorists practise islamic
social problems? the poor wants to make the rich suffer?
so they crash into buildings?
destroy underground trains stations and make the people suffer and die in the rubble?
my initial islamic convert thought jus died off there
i mean i got nothing against the malays and the caucasians
but the indians. so many of them came into my life
and triggered my hatred towards this pile
i have yet to find one, at least one which makes me say
"ah, thats one good guy.."
maybe its us, chinese who started it first..
doesnt mean u gotta give it back to the innocent us rite?

all i gotta say is that we gotta practise tolerance
accept what they have got to offer,
respect what they are,
try to see things in their way
that should work out perfectly well?
till the day i finally see one good man
will i ever write off racism off my mind

[[ Fallen Saint ]]*|23:34:00|
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+mysterious yet captivating love+

spinning: garbage - cherry lips

it is amazing what love does to somebody
when they are in it, their eyes twine and look in the same direction
when they start to see their differences parting day by day, they start to walk away
normally in these cases
scars run deep in their hearts
they bleed inside.
but on the outside they look perfectly fine

why am i saying all these?
no im not anything close to being in or even out of love
it happened to someone in my work place
this "good boy", by looking at him u know he's the kind who is the angel
today, he looks fucking shacked. cuz he jus got out of love
he goes ard borrowing cigarattes, and starts his self destruction
poor dude. no consoling is ever enough for him now
because he is in a trance where he longs for that someone
and only she can bring him back to reality

is that what love does to someone?
that part of the heart is have never explored
that region where lights up when two hearts tangle
that region which tears when two hearts are forced apart,
by certain unforeseen reasons or environment which they live in
it is freaky i know.
yet many are still figuring out how to tackle this fearsome creature
through different trials and tribulations they realise finally
by forgiving and forgetting they understand
the true meaning of certain things like love
its simple. no math, no values can explain these complicated issues

for me, the world has just began
and im taking one deep breath before diving straight in
to explore and find the different things in life to share
searching through millions for the one
after saying "i do"
the start of another life will resume
that, is another big chapter to reflect on..

[[ Fallen Saint ]]*|01:12:00|
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Thursday, July 7

+final regulars day out. rb day+

ryan cabrera - 40 kinds of sadness

the final day where i spent the day with the regular dudes
the last day we could be rb for a long long time..
the dudes will put down their civilian lives for 2 years starting friday
lets jus sum up the day in brief:

pearl river palace restaurant
buffet lunch at the place just below the convention centres
good food, good service, good price too
ha. oh u get one complimentary claypot of sharkfin when u dine there

click here for the pictures

for lunch its 23+++ per head
so its about 29 after everything
quite worth if you love dim sums and chinese food
the caucasians and japanese were there to dine as well
so i render its good?

fantastic 4
all thanks to rard's aunt for using her credit card
for getting us the preview tickets and good seats
thanks auntie.
the reviews werent too great
bud i love it.
the critics arent really that good nowadays
they are based on personal preferences
if you are stil hesitant about the movie
here are 10 reasons for you:
1. jessica alba is in it
2. she's so hot u can forget about watching other shows for at least a month
3. chris evans stars as human torch, is cute (dun worry im not gay yet)
4. chris evans spices the show with snow sufing, sports cars and dirt bikes
5. the longest running comic series
6. its another typical comic-turned-movie, so shldnt be any bad
7. u get 4 main characters, instead of jus one or two
8. u realise team work is important
9. u learn something out of villians and superheroes
10. because i say its good

coffee club/coffee bean
spend the rest of the time walking and searching for places
to sit down and jus chill
first stop: coffee club at paragon
cuz bakerzin was too crowded
mexicano was kinda too strong for me i tink
gastrc probs kicked up the whole night after that glass
tw left for his farewell dinner,
leaving the three of us..
searching for the next chill out spot
which was also our inital suggested place
coffee bean at taka. their couches are one of the best ard town
and there is so many of them. no fighting or ugly scenes
more talking. more gossiping. more final words.
sharing, giving and receiving.

yoshinoya
had dinner. more talking. bullshitting.
life stories, experiences, plans.
the last time im gonna see this bunch of dudes for at least 2 weeks
definitely im going to miss them..
thinking back on the happy and good times.
FUN.
one word describes it all
everyone of them is special in their own special way
i love them jus the way they are
im sounding like a homo. bleh

i haf stil 2 more months to burn
searching new shopping mates,
someone to give opinions
make my life better
someone to talk to in times of need
a group of friends jus to talk and haf FUN
good luck pals.
all these will sink deep into my memories.
one day i'll jus look back and smile.
cuz we know.. the happy times we spent will live in our hearts..

[[ Fallen Saint ]]*|00:41:00|
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Wednesday, July 6

+experience can only be learned, not taught+

spinning: dishwalla - counting blue cars

made our last trip to settlers' cafe at north canal
the final gaming experience for some of the dudes before their enlistment
the day was usual.
played a couple of card games..
cuz there was 9 of us
some of their first times there
must be quite a memorable trip for them i guess
tink they overcharged cuz it was our last trip..
lol. not sure

today's work experience was good!
no sales but i learnt stuffs
life lessons which can never be taught
only picked up when experiencing it
all i gotta say is:
value the ones u love before they are gone
cuz u never know when they will leave you

had a 5 mins chit-chat session with mom
she said something which made me ponder and wonder
here's how the conversation went:
me: "human beings are so selfish. they only bother about themselves"
mom: "not true.."
me: "they are. in their eyes its only me, myself and i."
mom: "if i were selfish, i would haf left you all and pursue my own passion..."
dead silence.. i left the room. bleh

[[ Fallen Saint ]]*|00:30:00|
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Sunday, July 3

+july weekend+

spinning: audiobullys feat nancy sinatra - bang bang
feeling: happy, relieved, exilarated

all those feelings add up together
and you understand why..
i jus got a new cpu!
its nice. white. tall. blue neon lights
cooling fans here and there
thats why im so broke now.
july's gonna suck
yuck.

i realise people all look the same
act the same and behave the same these days
stereotypes, inability to act like themselves
to haf their own styles and personalities
stop being such a fucking copy cat please

food fest feating food from the 60's
went there during my lunch break today
the food there mostly selling those food which reminds us of the old times
for us maybe it never appeared before
ask our parents den.
those which my parents would love
reminicence of their childhood gourmet
ice balls, teh tarik, fried vege, and other wierd stuffs never heard of
too bad its over.
for those who missed it. check out the papers
i saw reporters using high tech cams capturing some memories behind

6 hours of work on sundays
always turns me into a machine running everyday for 10 weeks
tired. but never producing
thats me in another few weeks time
i need a break.
from the world, from society, from reality
someone bring me into surrealism
into a perfect world where dreams come true

the final week for some of the dudes
who gonna be leaving for a secluded island for months
lets make life better.
enjoy it man.

[[ Fallen Saint ]]*|23:26:00|
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Saturday, July 2

+sedated saturday+

im so glad its finally the weekends
saturdays to be exact
all my brothers out with their respective activities in school or wadeva
shopping, swimming or extra lessons in school
it always leaves the whole two storey mansionette to me
of cuz there's always my grandma who stays with us since eons ago

i love the sedated mood on this day
laid back, relaxed, and uninterrupted
eating, drinking, having my music therapy
by the way, jem's new album finally woken is pretty good
welsh singer who moved to london and made her albums there
england, the place to be for relaxing, tour, honeymoon.
cuz their life there is so sedated
looking at old castles and buildings
with old english men drinking outside bars along the street
the perfect life that has been in my mind since young

i love talking to rach.
dunno why. got this "can-talk-anything-under-the-sun" feeling
as i was telling her
food fest along bugis street inside bugis junction
featuring food frm the 60s
and the new national library is open
the 14-storey building erected jus opp my office
majestic, mordern and jus simply magnificient
i see throngs of tourists passing by while their guide tells them all about it
you should see the awe on their faces
makes one feel proud of singapore for once

[[ Fallen Saint ]]*|17:23:00|
|

+life is a board game+

life is a game by itself
wadeva cards we choose
wadeva the number of the dice rolled
how much money we make in it
its only matters when u are seriously playing it
there's no big winner in life
we are all playing our own board games
we decide our fate, our rules, our game
we make our strategies,
we make our own little allies and enemies.
there's no love lost after a game however
a game is still a game
magically wonderful.
we're still kids in our hearts, adults on our minds

too much settlers' influencing me to think like a gamer?
maybe. probably not.
i wonder wad is the thing which keeps me going back there
wasting my whole afternoon and money
when im not very rich. not very free.
ahaa. its the ambience and the friendship which i treasure the most
neither money nor time is gonna give me those

work sucks today.
the dude who is supposed to sign up today?
he got me into deep shit
life is so unpredictable man.
after talking to that guy, my whole day was spoiled
totally moodless. cuz everyone else was having sales
friday nites can be such a boring day sometimes
when u cant find anyone to chill out with
and everybody else seems to be able to find someone to talk to
as usual.. life's a bitch
haf a good weekend pple

[[ Fallen Saint ]]*|01:20:00|
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Friday, July 1

+all guys day out+

spinning: foo fighters - all my life

one more all boys outing
the ones im gonna miss dearly..
i am counting down the days
the hours till the guys book in
till their hair goes back to earth
been thru so much with some of these guys

settlers cafe again
had fun playing nuclear war
big bunch of girls frm another school split into two tables
they took all the couches..
as long as we had fun who cares where we are

went walking ard town like the old days
where we used to hit town almost everyday after school
time pass.. so fast.. so quickly that you dont realise it has long passed
im gonna miss those days..
the happy and sad ones
the bright and dark ones
the ones which hit us so hard will definitely stay on longer
chit-chat session at scotts fc was jus another pleasant one like the ones we usually do
one more week people. haf fun

july jus hit us.
as i was saying. time passes so fast
half of 2005 is gone.. and here we are looking at the second half of it
26 weeks of it to go.
13 weeks of it to my national service
9 more weeks to my enlistment
4 weeks to the end of the year
time flies. really. one day we'll be with our kids
telling the old stories of our teenage lives
the ones they are gonna go thru like we do
the happy ones which we are never gonna go thru again
treasure time well people.

[[ Fallen Saint ]]*|00:40:00|
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